Perfection vs Presence

It is a powerful perspective to realize, that the price of the delusional processing of being perfect, is self-destruction. This doesn’t mean don’t try the best you can with everything you can bring to the moment. It does mean that perfect is an ideal. An ideal is a concept, a thought structure, it’s not actual.

A long time ago my only goal in life was to be the best (perfect) drummer in the world. Being the best meant being “better” then everyone else, whatever that means. The music world seems to be filled with “Who is The best Drummer” people. Oddly, not so much the drummers. Mostly fans.

“Best” is a very competitive mindset that may lead to narcissism insecurity, anger, arrogance, conflict, and fear, in varying degrees. And, since perfection doesn’t exist, trying to attain it is extremely frustrating. (To be fair, the other side of nothing being perfect is everything is perfect, I like that too!)

I meet people who want to argue that “Perfect” is the ideal that we shoot towards. The attempt to be perfect supplies a goal and meaning to our endeavors. In other words the reason we “get good” is because we are trying to be perfect. Shoot for the moon and land on top of a mountain. That means spending your life trying to “become” something other than what you are in the moment. You forget to embrace what you are. Instead you are always looking for the next you. There is no next you.

I have never met an accomplished musician who reports what drives them is to be perfect or the best. The under laying drive was love, curiosity, and the idea of expanding themselves. Sure, lots of people when starting out want to be the “best” but maturity dissolves that concept quickly. There is no competition, not even with the self, there is only the loving curiosity that says “Can I do this?” and “Can I keep evolving?” That way there is no resistance to who you are right now. You can celebrate you now!

I think if I love and accept something then I will be able to do it with all my attention, caring, and passion in the moment. I will never do it perfectly. To claim perfection is to claim arriving to a place, to claim doing out of love means being in the process. I am happy applying myself in this moments process as well as possible. What else is there?

I can hear it now. Love doing chores? Yeah right! Are you crazy?

Not any more than the norm.

Just because I don’t like or want to do a task doesn’t mean I can’t approach it with caring, attention, and passion. And who knows, if I keep going that way perhaps someday I will love that which is not currently loved.



6 thoughts on “Perfection vs Presence

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  1. Absolutely love this post! Society as a whole pushes (bullies) us into to believing that perfection is obtainable. When we fall for that belief – we are left in the ruins of shattered dreams at some point. I like what you said about forgetting who we ARE, because we are always looking for the BETTER version of ourselves. I had honestly never really stopped and thought about it from that angle. I have always be told that we shouldn’t strive to be better than anyone else, but rather better that who we were yesterday. In the midst of that belief – I know for myself, I have totally forgot who I am. Life truly should be lived from the perspective of love and passion and curiosity. It will likely bring about better deserved results.

    Thanks for enlightening my eyes my friend!
    Take Care-

    Liked by 1 person

  2. When I have clarity and lucidity, (which can be transient and intermittent,) I like to think of “perfect” as whatever is—nothing to change or strive for, but rather just appreciation for how things are in this moment.

    Li 🌸


    Liked by 1 person

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