Giving up on “liking” people?

I gave up. It seemed like my self appointed task to “like” people wasn’t doing much besides offering ongoing suffering. It seemed as though “liking” involved finding reasons to like and not like. Liking seemed so linked to duality. I liked some people and that set up disliking others. Liking automatically drove me into a conditioned comparison and evaluation.

Anthony D’Mello wrote something I found profoundly interesting and helpful. He points out that to love something is to truly let go of all attachments. He also indicates that our frame of reference is ” I leave you free to be yourself, to think your thoughts, to indulge your taste, follow your inclinations, behave in anyway you decide is to your liking.”

If we are able to take this frame of reference and make it our own, something happens. We find ourselves loving people the same way we love those special moments when we see clearly. The love of watching a colt running in a field, a sunset, the moon rise, a hug from someone who cares, that contact with an old loved friend, or perhaps the love of music or art. It’s not the book and movie love, it’s the deep love of accepting clearly. I think it’s a beautiful perspective, total acceptance and love.

The magic I found in this perspective is that flavor of love is unconditional.

I think I finally understand what unconditional love seems to pointing towards. So I’m spending more time falling in love and less time falling in like. There are changes taking place that I never expected. We are all spiritual beings trying to be human as well as possible.

Be well,


5 thoughts on “Giving up on “liking” people?

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  1. The non existence of love in the hearts of many will be reduced drastically if everyone has the mindset of accepting unconditional love and affection instead of war and crisis. Thanks Bryan❤


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